The Jefferson JUGgernaut™ – Flex Your Freedom Edition
He wrote the Declaration of Independence…
then bench-pressed it.
Introducing the Jefferson JUGgernaut™, the only weaponized workout station that doubles as a constitutional crisis.
This isn’t just fitness — it’s founding father fitness.
Forget pre-workout. Jefferson ran on liberty, adrenaline, and a light dusting of gunpowder.
⚙️ Specs:
💪 Cannon Weight: 1,776 pounds of pure send potential.
🔥 Recoil Level: Classified — known to launch nearby interns into orbit.
🎩 Material: Hand-forged from melted muskets and bad decisions.
🎶 Soundtrack: “Stars and Stripes Forever” remixed with electric guitar and heavy breathing.
⚡ Output: Enough freedom per rep to power a small colony.
Features:
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Pit Viper Integration: Activates automatically when flex detected.
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Freedom Grip Handles: Smell faintly of gun oil and destiny.
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Liberty Mode: Reps count themselves in Roman numerals.
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Declaration Display Screen: Flashes “Pursuit of Happiness Achieved” after every set.
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Ammo Loader Pre-Workout Cup: Holds one scoop of powdered chaos.
Customer Reviews:
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ “Hit three reps and immediately bought land.” – Kyle, Louisiana Purchase
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ “I flexed once and heard a bald eagle scream the Bill of Rights.” – Tanner, Lake Havasu
⭐⭐ “Tore my tricep but gained dual citizenship in freedom.” – Anonymous Patriot
Warning:
May cause:
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Excessive quoting of the Declaration
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Sudden bursts of violin appreciation
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Spontaneous revolutions at the gym
🇺🇸 The Jefferson JUGgernaut™ – Flex Hard, Live Free, Send It Loud. 🇺🇸
More details
- Solid colors are 100% ring-spun cotton
- Sport Grey is 90% ring-spun cotton, 10% polyester
- Dark Heather is 65% polyester, 35% cotton
- Lightweight fabric: 4.5 oz/yd² (153 g/m²)
EU GPSR Product Information:
- Manufacturer contact information
- Name: Shredneck
- Email: contact@support.theshredneck.com
- Postal address: PO Box 5696 Santa Monica, CA 90405
- Additional information: This product is made for adults. Meets the flammability, lead, cadmium, bisphenols and phthalates level requirements. 2 year warranty in EEA and UK, established by Directive 1999/44/EC.
Size & Fit
Quality Guarantee & Returns
- Quality is guaranteed. If there is a print error or visible quality issue, we'll replace or refund it.
- Because the products are made to order, we do not accept general returns or sizing-related returns.
The Jefferson JUGgernaut™ – Flex Your Freedom Edition Size Guide
| Size label | Length | Width | Sleeve length |
|---|---|---|---|
|
S
|
28
|
18
|
16.75
|
|
M
|
29
|
20
|
17.88
|
|
L
|
30
|
22
|
19.13
|
|
XL
|
31
|
24
|
20.38
|
|
2XL
|
32
|
26
|
21.63
|
|
3XL
|
33
|
28
|
22.75
|